They can’t take that away from me

Moving day.

I’m brokenhearted about leaving this loft.  It’s so beautiful and I have enjoyed being here.  Even after two years I am still so in love with it.  I will be really sad to see our time here end.  I’ve enjoyed every day we were here.  I just have to remember, “I got to have that,” and let it be.

It’s okay for things to end.  We don’t want to think of letting things go, especially things that we love.  But it’s how things go.  It’s okay, or it will be, anyway, even if it’s really NOT okay right at this moment.  This is me telling myself, because there are times when I don’t believe a whit of it.

I can always remember that I got to have that.  I got to have the amazing penthouse loft of my dreams.  The fact that the dream is ending doesn’t take away the fact that I had it, that I enjoyed it, that I reveled in it, in fact.  No, they can’t take that away from me.

“We may never, never meet again

On the bumpy road to love
Still, I’ll always, always keep the memory of

The way you hold your knife
The way we danced till three
The way you changed my life
No, no, they can’t take that away from me”

I know, I know, there are bigger issues in life.  I’m quoting love songs about my loft.  I’m spoiled.  Or I may finally, really be losing it.

But it’s okay to grieve this.

A friend asked me, “What about your lifestyle?  Won’t you miss all this?”  And I have to say that yes, the lifestyle was great.  I loved living in our loft, I loved going out to eat and having all the toys.  But in reality, the lifestyle is not what it’s all about.  The lifestyle doesn’t make you happy.  What makes me happy is being together with Martin, and knowing I’m on the path I’m supposed to be on.  That feeling beats going out to dinner at the fanciest restaurants, having the nicest car, the latest i-Something or living in the most stupendous home.

Even when I’m sad, as I am right now, I can lean on the knowledge that we’re doing the right thing.  And even as devastated as I feel sometimes, they’re only feelings.  It will be okay.  It will be okay.  Say it with me.  It will be okay.

We are lucky.  We got to have that.  And now, we get to have something different.  I don’t know what yet.  I’ll let you know when I do.  Until then, one foot in front of the other.

3 thoughts on “They can’t take that away from me

  1. We are SO Thankful that we got to have you in this space for two years! Thank you for these kind words…it helps to know that some of our tenants Really appreciate their loft space! We will miss you & your family. You never know, maybe one day you’ll find yourself back in Springtown and the loft will be waiting for you.

  2. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen the movie Fiddler On The Roof. There’s a song/scene where they are leaving their little village. Finally, Tevye’s wife says,” Its JUST a place…” You have no idea what wonders you’ll encounter in SA, but I’ll bet that by the end of your time, there will be things you won’t want to leave. When my sister was married to a member of the State Dept and their assignment was in Seoul, S Korea, she said, when they first moved there, it was SUCH a culture shock and there was SO much TRAFFIC that she really hated it. By the time they left, she knew she would miss hearing the temple bells ringing each morning, the children going off to school, all the familiar things they’d come to love. And so will you. Peace to you and Martin. I look forward to more stories

  3. Nonattachment is good, but that WAS a pretty sweet loft…

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